Thanks for Asking!

One of the odd little things I've noticed about parents of twins is that they really don't like to hear people talk about their kids' similarities. If you tell parents of twins that their kids look alike or act alike, they'll never agree with you, and in some cases they get kinda offended. There've been a couple times where Kathy or I have made the social faux pas of asking a twin parent whether their twins were identical when they weren't, and lemme tell ya, they don't like it one bit. One time we met these parents whose kids, I swear, looked absolutely identical - like they put the one kid in a Xerox machine and made another kid. And so we asked them if their twins were identical, and they basically said that they didn't know and they didn't care, and then they totally lost interest in talking to us. It was as if we had asked if their twins had herpes or something.

Our daughters don't look the same at all, so the only people who ever ask us if they're identical are twentysomething-year-old guys who think that all babies look the same. I find that the most common question I get asked now is something along the lines of "So, do they have different personalities?"

Now, I don't find this question particularly offensive, but it is kind of a funny question. Does any parent out there think that all their kids have the same personalities? It would be like saying "my children are not unique or special in any way!" or "my children are little zombie-clones that react the same way in every situation!"

So, for the record, yes, they do have different personalities. Riley, who's the older sister by 24 minutes, does in fact act like the older sister - more reasonable and more independent - while Leah does in fact act like the younger sister - more emotional (in a good way and a bad way), more affectionate, and more scared of new things. In personality shorthand, basically Riley is more me, and Leah is more Kathy. And since I'm an older sibling and Kathy's a younger sibling, it all fits, nice and symmetrical-like.

It all makes me wonder about that whole debate about nature versus nurture. Do Kathy and I subconsciously treat Riley like an older sibling, thereby causing her to act like one? Or does her DNA just happen to include personality traits that are more "older sibling"-ish? Is the fact that I spend more time with Riley and Kathy spends more time with Leah causing Riley to come out more like me and Leah to come out more like Kathy? Or is it their inherent personality traits that attracts them more to a particular parent?

I don't really have any answers, but I find it fun to ask the questions. That's what our life has become - one big high-school-science-fair genetics project. Just without the poster board. Plus I didn't put much effort into my science fair projects.

Um, anyway...