Fight the Power

I’m going to admit to something here that’s probably a big parenting “no-no”, but boy, it sure is fun watching Leah and Riley fight. Aren’t parents supposed to hate it when their children fight? I’m pretty sure that my parents didn’t burst out laughing whenever I used to fight with my brother. And I’m almost positive they didn’t cheer or yell out things like “OH! SNAP! You go, Riley! Leah, you got SERVED!"

(Okay, so we don’t actually say “SNAP”. Was that even proper usage of “SNAP”? Where’s my urban dictionary?)

The twins’ fighting is a pretty recent phenomenon. Up until a month or two ago, Leah would just snatch toys out of Riley’s hands over and over and over, and Riley would generally act kinda bummed about it, but would never fight back or try to snatch her toy back. I have to say, this had us a little worried. I envisioned a long and painful adolescence for Riley, with bullies constantly taking her milk money or hanging her inside her locker or whatever it is that real bullies that aren’t in ‘80s teen movies actually do. I also envisioned Leah turning into this Biff-in-Back-to-the-Future-like bully, feeling like she could just get everything she wanted in life by just being a brute and grabbing it.

But just like Marty McFly eventually worked up the courage to punch Biff at the Enchantment Under the Sea dance, one day, Riley decided that she had endured this bullying for long enough. Here's the play-by-play on how it went down:

• Leah grabs a toy from Riley.
• Riley grabs the toy back.
• Leah grabs the toy back.
• Riley grabs the toy back.
• Leah tries to grab the toy from Riley but after ten seconds of pulling is unable to free it from Riley's vice-like clutches.
• Leah starts crying.
• Riley grins.

As Leah sat there crying, Kathy and I cheered. I know this probably makes us sound like horrible parents, but trust me, after months of watching Leah bully Riley around, you would've cheered too.

Since that day, Riley has become more and more assertive, to the point where Riley's almost becoming the bully and Leah is becoming the bullied. Now, Leah and Riley seem to fight at least once a day, and, while Leah's still trying to show Riley her proper place, Riley always seems to hold her own. And then last week at the playground, our nanny tells us that some 2-year old boy grabbed one of Riley's toys and Riley responded by knocking this 2-year-old down to ground and grabbing her toy back. And then, while the boy lay on the ground crying, Riley grinned.

Oh snap.