The Art of Multi-Tasking

I don't think I'll get any argument from Kathy here when I say that I'm horrible at multi-tasking. Whenever I have to try to concentrate on two separate tasks at the same time, I will usually fail miserably in at least one of the two tasks. And most of the time, I'll fail miserably on both tasks. Like if I try to call my parents to ask about something while I'm making a grilled cheese sandwich, I will usually burn the grilled cheese sandwich, plus I will forget what the heck I was going to ask my parents about. Or if Kathy sends me to the kitchen to get her a glass of water, the Bay Area section of the newspaper, and bottles of formula for Leah and Riley, I will come back with a glass of water, the Sports section, and no bottles whatsoever.

I'm not quite sure why this is, but I do great when I'm concentrating on one thing at a time, but I become a hopeless bumbling idiot when I suddenly have to concentrate on two separate things. This is a source of endless frustration for Kathy, who seemingly has no problem concentrating on forty-two things at a time.

Unfortunately for me, multi-tasking suddenly becomes a major part of the job description when you have twins. By definition, if you're watching two babies at the same time, you sorta have to be able to actually pay attention to both babies at the same time. Or you at least have to be paying enough attention to avoid physically or emotionally injuring either of the two babies. It's a tall order for a multi-tasking-impaired guy like myself.

This past Sunday, I got a nice little crash-course in multi-tasking when Kathy took a few hours off from baby patrol to go for a walk and have lunch with a friend. Naturally, an hour or so into my time alone with the twins, both Leah and Riley were screaming at the top of their lungs, both demanding to be fed NOW NOW NOW. Typically, Kathy and I will feed the hungrier baby first and let the other baby wait her turn on the playmat or something, but by the tone of the screams this time I knew that neither baby was going to be too keen on waiting for her meal.

So, improvising quickly, I put one U-shaped Boppy pillow on either side of me on the couch, put one baby on each pillow, and then, by sitting in a semi-awkward position with my arms haphazardly askew, I was able to bottle-fed both Leah and Riley at the same time. And then to top it all off, when Leah finished her bottle, I was able to tilt Leah up with one hand and pat her on the back to make her burp, all while continuing to feed Riley with the other hand.

It was a small but triumphant moment of victory for this multi-tasking impaired dad. It was one of those moments where you're just bummed that nobody was there to witness it.

Well, nobody except for Leah and Riley. But they really didn't seem all that impressed.