Hey Jealousy
It's been pretty amazing watching Leah and Riley become more and more aware of each other, but the flip side is that we're starting to see what looks like the early stages of twin jealousy seeping in. You can see it when Kathy comes home from work -- both the girls' faces instantly light up, and both Leah and Riley eagerly hold their arms out toward mommy, impatiently waiting for mommy to pick them up. And because mommy has not yet mastered the art of simultaneously picking up two babies without bonking their heads together, she will generally pick up one baby while daddy swoops in to distract the other baby so that she doesn't realize that she is getting the oh-so-short end of the parent stick.
For the record, this swooping never works. Leah and Riley may be just eight months old, but they sure as hell know the difference between mommy picking them up and hugging them and daddy swooping in and making raspberry sounds and chanting "mmm-bah". Um, Daddy, I've known mommy a long time... mommy is a friend of mine. Daddy, you're no mommy.
So, despite daddy's efforts, the "other" girl will stare longingly at her sister being hugged by mommy, and you can almost see the little cartoon thought-cloud over her head saying "Hey! That's MY mommy! Get away from MY mommy!"
In general, Leah's the jealous one. She's the one always reaching to the other side of the double stroller to steal Riley's toys. In one instance, Leah reached over and grabbed Riley's pacifier right out of her mouth and triumphantly inserted it into her own mouth. This happened even though Leah doesn't actually like pacifiers, and never has. No matter -- Leah saw Riley enjoying her pacifier and had to put a stop to it. Gotta show Riley who's boss, ya know.
Speaking of jealousy -- why the heck does mommy get the dramatic, heartfelt hug greeting when she gets home and daddy just gets a smile and maybe a giggle if he's lucky? What is daddy, parental chopped liver?
As it turns out, kinda, yes. I guess that's what we get for not having things like breasts and birth canals.
posted by Dave @ 7:50 PM
2 comments
2 Comments:
This is really funny! It reminds me of one of my favorite guilty pleasures: The Dog Whisperer, you know, Ceasar Milan ("CM")! In case you're not aware, when people have a troubled dog with behavior problems (think, terrible separation anxiety that leads to the dog jumping out the window to follow you, or, a dog that won't stop barking when mommy and daddy ride the motor cycle, or, dog that tugs SO much on the leash that the owners are being taken for a walk) - they call CM to swoop in and train the dog.
In a similar vein to CM, you *could* subject your daughters to this behavioral training. CM has been brought in when dogs jump up on their owners (or any other visitor) and just about knocks them over with their excitement. And in these scenarios, CM has told the owners that they need to exert their alpha status: when the owners come home, they need to ignore their pet and act in a way that is nonchalant so that their pets learn that the owner will greet when the owner is ready, and not before.
Now - you can apply this training to your daughters, mommy can ignore the little girls when she gets home, while daddy lavishes attention on the girls when he gets home. This may level the playing field a bit.
Though I understand this gives the girls on heads up on ignoring their parents...which most parents want to put off until the teenage years.
And in these times of figuring out what to do, I check in with the Gilmore Girls. Dave, recall that Rory reveres her mom, but also loves Luke and Christopher. So, despite being raised by a single mom (who was the center of her world), Rory grows up to love and depend on Luke. So see - there's hope! Just keep making the good pancakes and coffee for your girls!
Then again, when the girls become old enough to appreciate daddy's thoughtful and heartwarming blogs, I get the feeling that the girls will score extra points for daddy. I realize this may not happen until the girls are in their 20s...
Good luck, Gin Blossoms loving dad.
Amy
I'm right there with you Dave.. Even my illusion of light, can barely match the reaction of Mommy walking into the room..
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